Dear Nicholas,

Source:  Pixabay.com

(Nicholas is one of my great-nephews.  A couple weeks after his 18th birthday made him a legal adult, he moved out of his parents' home and in with his grandparents.  In the interest of not sticking my nose in where I'm not invited, I'm satisfying myself by giving advice here.)

Dear Nicholas,

You recently made your first adult decision, which was to move out of your parents' home.  You've accepted a lot of responsibility for yourself, and have chosen a challenging means to go about it.  Let me share a top-nine list of unsolicited advice:

1. FINISH HIGH SCHOOL.  Let me join the chorus of adults, friends, and relatives singing this song.  Even those who don't agree with how you're going about it agree on this. A high school diploma is the basic stepping stone to the rest of your life.
2. WORK. You've chosen to invoke your adulthood, and that means you must work during the time you're finishing high school.  You need to be making at least your own spending money, and to be able to contribute to your room and board will help earn the trust and respect of your grandparents. Some of your family has already offered you small jobs.  Do your best at whatever is offered.  No job is too small. 
3. FIGURE OUT YOUR TRANSPORTATION.  Your grandparents don't have an extra car, and can't afford to put a teen-aged male driver on their insurance.  City bus, bicycle and shank's mares will be your go-to for now. 
4. MAKE YOUR POST-GRADUATION PLAN NOW.  Will you continue on to college, or perhaps a technical certificate of some sort?  You've indicated an interest in auto mechanics.  Follow up!  All of the trades are desperate for workers, and you can make a good living doing them.   Like many of us, you will probably change career paths more than once in your life.  However, you have an urgent need to be able to support yourself ASAP.  It's what adults do.
5. STAY AWAY FROM GIRLS UNDER 18!  Girls that were interesting the day before your birthday became jail-bait on your birthday.  18-year-old girls are your new baseline.
6. TAKE CARE OF YOUR PHYSICAL AND MENTAL HEALTH.  We all have challenges in this area, and you know yours.  It's not about having them, it's about how we manage them.  There's plenty of help available.  Take advantage of it if you need it.
7.  YOU CAN'T GO WRONG BY LIVING THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.  They still provide a framework of honesty, kindness, gratitude and humility. There are plenty of websites that have updated the 10 Commandments to speak to modern sensibilities.  
8. YOU CAN DO IT.  Being and adult is now your life work.  It's going to be difficult, but by no means impossible.  Growth and progress comes from challenge; you have to work for it. 
9. YOU ARE LOVED.  Lots of people are in your corner.  We all want you to have a happy, fulfilled and successful life.  

 “Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it.”

                                               ---Ella Williams